It is International Women’s Day. I am in my car and the radio is playing in the background. It is all about celebrating women today. In the usual banter the female host asks the male host about the women who have been important in his life.
There is a slight pause before the host begins to talk about his family and he focuses on a great aunt who raised his mother. From his words you knew that this woman was the backbone of the family and that she held a special place in his heart. He said the worst thing he ever had to do was to eulogize his great aunt. He went on to say that she lived to a ripe old age living out her last years in a Long Term Care facility.
His next words were that they were ‘lucky’. The facility was a “good one, thank God.”
I cringed.
In a letter dated December 18, 2020 I wrote to Premier Doug Ford, Hon. Merrilee Fullerton the then Minister of Long Term Care and copied to a number of organizations relevant to Long Term Care. In it I identified a number of issues and concerns and wrote:
I am fortunate, feel very lucky and blessed that my loved one is in a good home. Yes, sir there are good homes but what is wrong with that sentence? No one chooses or wants to be in LTC. They are there because they need to be and I believe that everyone in LTC should be able to say that their loved one is in a good home without a preface of ‘feeling lucky’ or ‘fortunate’ or ‘blessed’.
I still preface or expand my description of my Bert’s home using those same words and each time I have a sense of discomfort. Every person who needs to be in a long term care facility should be in a good home. It should be a given. Standards of care should be the same, no matter where you live or who you are. No one should be dependent on the luck of the draw to be able to spend their last years in a good home.
The Meander: I am glad that lovely woman was in a good home. How I wish all residents in long term care facilities were in good homes.