It’s a Journey

Life is a journey is an oft repeated cliché.  There is truth in it.  What better way to describe the path we each travel from birth to death.

My Bert and I recently celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary.  I have been pondering our journey together.  There have been many journeys within the journey.  All began as unknown territory.

Journeys begin with hello.  They end with goodbye.  Some flash by like comets others are slow perambulations.   Some are sunlight, some are dark night; some give you strength, some make you weak.

Some you want to hold forever; some you can’t wait to let go.  Some make you laugh until you cry some only make you cry. 

There are journeys that you seek and journeys that are thrust upon you.

Some journeys lead you to people who become Lifeliners, friends forever.  Some lead to people who are fleetingly important for just a moment in time.

Journeys are moments, no matter the duration.   Some are landmarks of your life that help you find your soul, your strength, your spirit.   Journeys are multifaceted.  You juggle the segments, living them concurrently.   Journeys teach you to multitask.

Journeys are never straight, direct or easy.  Yet once you begin you must continue.

Some journeys seem never ending.  You stumble, ineffectual, distraught, full of fear, numb with disappointment.   You see chasms and dangerous cliffs, mountains that seem too high to scale.  There are twists and turns and unexpected obstacles.  These are the fragments that seem to be put in your path to frustrate you, only you.  Now comes the realization that this is really your journey, only you can walk this particular road, only you can make the decision which path to take.

 It is wonderful when you can take control of the journey.  You have solutions to problems, answers to questions; you dream the impossible and see it become possible.   You start out in uncharted waters diving into unknown territory and surprisingly make a safe, happy landing.   Yes, some journeys are wonderful, delightful and satisfying.

Each one has a life journey.  How you travel it is up to you.   You can accept the help of friends and family with grace.  You may show gratitude for the kindness of strangers.  You may be lucky to give love and have it returned twofold.  In the end your journey will be a reflection of your truth, of you.

More than 50 years ago My Bert and I like so many others have over the years, made a decision to walk our journeys together.    What a journey it has been and continues to be.  On this challenging leg the decision on how the journey unfolds is mine to make for both of us. I can make us both miserable; bemoan the unfairness of it all or I can embrace the privilege that it is to be a caregiver to the one you love and to whom you are the world.

My Bert and I are still saying hello to love, to life, to joy.  We embrace the moments and while they are fleeting for him and lasting for me they are our moments.  His journey and mine will commingle as they have for more than 50 years.    We will continue to walk in tandem and greet each day with hope that it will be a good day.

The Meander:   The day you are born is the day you begin to die.  That is inevitable, inescapable and undeniable.    As my Bert and I continue to say hello at the dawn of each new day I hope we will both be able to rise to the occasion and be ready to say goodbye at journey’s end.  In the meantime we will keep on with the journey.  We will live the moments and not look around the bend.    Why bother? What is there will come without fail.

7 thoughts on “It’s a Journey”

  1. Another lovely post Paula.
    If only I had your strength, your outlook on life. Shared your vision of the world, of the future. I am currently drowning in despair, fear, uncertainty and unending worry. My father is facing the worst most difficult uphill fight of his life; one his doctors dont think he will win. I fear his journey will be ending sooner than I’m ready for, than he’s ready for. I truly dont know how I’m going to cope with everything should that outcome , come to be. I continue to have truly awful dreams about all this. The turmoil, the familial unrest between myself & my older sister & nieces. All the turmoil that is to follow should my father meet his end. Just the thoughts of it, overwhelms me and sends shivers of fear right through me. I look for guideance from others and I send out silent prayers to god. I will need all that and more if I am to cope with and handle all that is yet to come my way.
    Perhaps one day, I will have the strength you have.

    1. Stephanie, I am aware of the double stress you have. I do not even want to imagine how I would cope in your situation. I wish I had a magic wand to take away your pain but I do not. All I can do is say a prayer for you, wish you all the very best and hope you find your strength in some way and some day soon. Acknowledging the hurt, recognizing the tremendous challenges ahead is part of finding that strength which is in you.

      I send you love and wish you peace.

      1. Thank you so much Paula for your kind words and thoughtful prayers. It’s friends like you that I need around me the most right now as I try to find strength to get through these difficult times.
        I only wish I had family members I could truly count on to help and to trust. I even wish I had siblings I could rely on who would work with me, and help me care for both my parents. Sadly I just dont have that. Breaks my heart. Makes me think about my nieces who I miss very much. Because of my sister my parents and I have not seen my nieces in 3 yrs. I know how much that hurts my dad as he sees his life coming to its end. My mother is oblivious which I suppose is a good thing. I want so very much to fix him, to unburden him, to help him carry his load, but sadly most things only he can make the decisions on. Its a truly helpless feeling. I just wish I could improve his journey and make it more peaceful for him.
        Anyway, enough of my burdening you with this. Thank you again for your continued support and kindness.

  2. That was as impressive a rumination as any you have given us, Paula. Full of truths, hopes, and wisdom. And all from someone so young! What is this nonsense about you and Bert being married 50 years?! A likely story!!!

    1. Aah! You put a smile on my face and that is good. I made a mistake. I think I put the zero in the wrong place as perhaps it should be 05? We ‘young’ folks tend to make mistakes. Hahaha.

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